Championship week one
Welcome to week 1,
After last seasons 2nd place battle between the Stunts and Limiteds both will now be pushing for the title, however league one champions Milf have arrived onto the scene to give them both a challenge. Unfortunately for Milf their opponents were so scared of them they didn’t even bother showing to give Milf an easy win. For the Limiteds their opponents NightWolves may as well have not bothered as they got spanked 7 ways to Sunday and once again it seemed too simple for Limiteds. Fellow title hopefuls Stunts were stunned into silence as the mighty Joe Camel FC pulled off what has to go down as an upset. A loss for Stunts may mean that their title dreams are over even at this early stage while the Camels will be dreaming of silverware after 3 seasons of hurt. The Swan and the Paedo managed a victory over VSA in what was a clean contest. VSA continue their dismal form while Swan and Paedo find themselves towards the top end of the table for a change.
How it went down
Apparently the Limiteds have undertaken this new yoga football class offered by the woodcock. They seem more flexible, agile and don’t even celebrate their goals because as soon as it leaves their feet they know it’s going in. Not sure if the Limiteds were that good yesterday or the NightWolves were just that bad. Either way the wolves were sent to the kennel by 3 men. Lewis, Mitchell and Kolb all tranquilised the wolves as they dominated them like Wayne Rooney dominated Gallas. Ryan Dawson in the NightWolves goal must have walked away with a broken hand as his defence fell asleep on pretty much every occasions and he was forced to make about 6 or 7 great saves. All too easy Limiteds 11-3 NightWolves.
The Stunts were up next against a Camel side that was desperate for silverware. The stunts in the opening moments were undone by the front pairing of Shuffy and Diego; in fact the Stunts just couldn’t tackle Diego. In true shuffy fashion the deadlock was not broken it was smashed open with a cracker from the half way line. Diego then followed up with 2 to put the Camels into a comfortable lead. Melling and Elliot were great in defence and it seems as though the 5 starting camels may ride their luck this season as they played pure 5 a side. Despite their clear cut possession at the end of the first half James managed to net twice to set up a fiery 2nd half. The Stunts keeper made some fine saves but almost let a whooper into his own net. Harvey wasn’t playing his A game taking too much time on the ball. Todd and Will were good at the back but were caught napping on several occasions. The Stunts didn’t get back into it in the second half with Shuffy adding another. In the end it was Camels 4-2 Stunts.
The ambulances were at the ready, first aiders called in and the police on speed dial as Swan and Paedo and VSA renewed their rivalry this season. In what has to be a surprise it was a clean game with no abuse and no fouling (well only a little). Lynh Viu opened for VSA as VSA looked as if they would pull off their first ever victory. However in fairness they did have their keeper Ebie who saved on numerous occasions keeping the Swans at bay. Swans pressure paid off with the deadly Dave’s Hicks and Adams hammering away in the 2nd half. Dave Hicks scored first and VSA were truly on the back foot and a minute later a Van ree ball found Harding to put the Swans ahead. From this point on it was all one way traffic as Dave Adams netted to make it 3 and Joe to make it 4. A good 2nd half comeback from the Swans definitely deserved. Swans 4-1 VSA.
Player Cam
Goal of the day. Matt Shuffy (Camels). With one of his patented rocket launchers from the half way line. Apparently NASA have offered him a placement as his shots seem to go faster than their rockets.
Lewis (Limiteds) Also scored a screamer as he dummied one defender, the nutmegged the other before scoring, great goal.
Silky. Lewis and Mitchell (Limiteds). A treat to watch these two as if Lewis didn’t get enough he also hit the post twice, both their ballerina and salsa classes came into play in the game as they danced around the defence
Saves. Ryan Dawson (NightWolves), Ross (Stunts) ND Ebbie (VSA).Lots of fine goal keeping action today
Swans to fly high. A bit early to tell, but if they perform the way they did in the 2nd half all throughout the season it would amaze me if they didn’t finish in the top 4. However there are still 6 weeks of action and even Burley were near the top of the table at one point.
Team of the week
Gk Ebbie (VSA)
DF Joe Harding (Fairies)
MDF Diego (Camels)
AMF Mitchell (Limiteds)
FW Lewis (Limiteds)
Player of the week-. Mitchell (sorry if your name is actually Michael can’t read the refs writing) take a bow son, top draw.
Please see the spreadsheet attached, let me know if anything is wrong.
Aston Championship season 4 wk 1
Nilesh
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